Sex toys are fast becoming the norm for people who want to explore their sexuality. But unfortunately, as a man, owning a sex toy is something that might seem unusual to many people. And trust me, it’s not your fault. Society and popular culture have made male sex toys feel like an anomaly, a taboo. But is it? Are sex toys abominable for you as a man?
There are many reasons why you – or your friends – might cringe when you mention sex toys to them. However, a study carried out at Indiana University revealed that 45% of men between 18-65 use sex toys (2). In another study, while 42% of women participants agreed to own sex toys, only 20% of men who participated in the survey agreed to the same.
Quite shocking, isn’t it?
Well, most of these men don’t use these toys as comfortably as women use theirs. The men who use these toys are not as open about their usage as women are.
So, why are men ashamed of using sex toys?
I will tell you.
But before I tell you why men aren’t open about their use of sex toys, let me explain what sex toys are
WHAT ARE MALE SEX TOYS?
Male sex toys, also called adult toys, are objects that men use to have more pleasure during sex or alone. You can use sex toys with your partner or alone.
REASONS MEN AREN’T OPEN ABOUT USING SEX TOYS
Society hasn’t come to terms with the dynamism of men’s sexuality. Many men are not expected to be sexually explorative. Hence the disregard people have towards sex toys for men. It is also believed, in popular cultures, that men’s sexuality is simple, and so there is no need for sex toys. Hey, you can get an orgasm with your hand, so why use a sex toy?
Many people believe that only gay men use sex toys. Heterosexual men should never be seen using sex toys. It is meant only for gay men.
Sex toys are pleasure toys designed to help men – homosexual, heterosexual or transgender men – reach orgasm. It is not for gay men only!
Only Underperforming men need sex toys
As a man, you are not good enough, so you’ll use sex toys. Real men don’t use sex toys, many have said. Of course, this is a lie. Sex toys can be used as an addition, or for men who want to go solo, sex toys are perfect for going solo. I know your hands are good, but why not try something better, something new and different? Sex toys are the answer.
You are not underperforming because you use sex toys with your partners. I’ll tell you why soon.
As a man, using sex toys does not in any way make you less a man or a pervert. Actually, it means you love exploring the vast expanse of your sexuality. Now, if you hear sex toys, the first thing that comes to your mind is Dildo. Or vibrator. But there are sex toys for men. Toys are specially designed to give you a swell time.
BENEFITS OF SEX TOYS
Helps you relieve stress:
Research has shown that masturbation helps men relieve stress (3). How? When you masturbate, your body releases feel-good hormones such as endorphins and oxytocin. These hormones help you release stress. And when you use sex toys such as FLESHLIGHT to masturbate, you get a stronger orgasm. And with stronger orgasms comes more feel-good hormones being released.
Sex toys help you sleep:
Samantha Evans, a former nurse, and co-founder of the sex toy company Jo-Divine said, “sex toys help men enhance sexual pleasure, and orgasm can help men sleep, boost immunity, relieve pain, reduce stress and boost your brain power.” (4)
Helps men with Erectile dysfunction
Sex toys for men help men who are having a hard time getting and maintaining an erection maintain their erection for long. Toys such as penis rings and penis pumps are medically proven ways to help men produce and sustain erections – with the former helping with sustained erection and the latter to produce an erection.
Sex toys give a man release from performance anxiety
Many men are anxious to perform well with their partners, leading to performance anxiety. When you use sex toys, there is no pressure to perform, so you can just have fun and do your thing. Even if you’re using sex toys with your partner, you are still expected to “perform.” A great way to have fun with no pressure at all!
WHAT TO LOOK OUT FOR WHEN CHOOSING A SEX TOY
Have you decided that you want a sex toy? Whether it is for masturbation or to use it with your partner?
Here are three things you should look out for when buying a sex toy.
What material is the toy made from?
The sex toy material is important because it will determine whether you’ll have a good time and use it longer, or you’ll regret buying it at all. Most sex toys for men are designed with the female anatomy in mind.
Hence the materials used are soft, something that almost feels like the natural thing – a vagina or a mouth giving a man a blowjob. The most commonly used material for male sex toys is silicone. However, some sex toy companies use ABS plastic, toughened glass, etc. A skin-safe material is your best bet.
What do you want to achieve?
If you are gunning for anal pleasure, then butt plugs and prostate massagers are your best bet. But if you have erectile dysfunction, penis pumps and penis rings will do just fine to help you get and sustain an erection, as well as delay ejaculation. If you want to be more experimental, you can try vibrators for men and masturbation sleeves.
Is it medically approved?
Most of these sex toys are designed for pleasure, no doubt, but some are used for medical reasons. Toys such as penis pumps and prostate massagers are medically prescribed for men with different erectile and issues. So, before buying that penis pump or prostate massager, confirm that it has been medically certified for use.
TYPES OF SEX TOYS FOR MEN
1) MASTURBATION SLEEVES
When Steve Shubin, the sex tech Kingpin, invented Fleshlight, the most popular masturbation sleeve, little did he know that the torchlike toy will go on to pave the way for other fascinating sex toys for men. Masturbation sleeves are textured devices that encapsulate and stimulate the penis.
A masturbation sleeve is made from soft, temperature-receptive materials that make it feel like a vagina or a mouth (5).
The interiors of these sleeves are textured, and they have different tightness levels, allowing you to choose how tight you want the sleeve to hold your erect penis. Most of them are battery-powered. Recent tech has added vibrations to these sleeves, enhancing the masturbating experience.
They are also called strokers, penis sleeves, or sex sleeves. Some masturbation sleeves are lined with bumps and ridges that create a different sensation from the smooth one you’ll get with your hand (5).
Things To Look Out For When Buying A Masturbation Sleeve
- The material used in the interior: Is the inside soft and textured or hard and dry? Soft and textured is the way to go.
- Is it battery-powered or automatic?
- Does it have a vibration or not?
2) PENIS PUMPS
If you have erectile dysfunction, then you need a penis pump like the Penomet. They are also called erection pumps. These toys create suction around your penis, driving blood to your shaft. This increase in blood flow causes increased sensitivity and sensation. Insert your penis in the tube and start pumping. The sucker pulls more blood into blood vessels and causes you to have a stronger, larger-than-regular erection
Things To Look Out For When Buying A Penis Pump
- Does it use a battery or not?
- Does it have a quick-release valve?
- Is the ring on the opening soft?
- Is it medically approved?
3) PENIS RINGS
Also called C-Rings, penis rings are stretchy bands that fit around the base of your penis. The C-Ring constricts blood flow, allowing you to maintain your erection for longer and delay ejaculation. Most penis rings are made from soft silicone and leather. Penis rings increase sensation.
Some penis rings have vibrators at their base, making them dual-purpose: helping you sustain your erection, while the vibrator at the base stimulates your woman’s clits as you thrust in and out of her.
A quick warning: Don’t wear a penis ring for more than 20-30 minutes. Remove it as soon as you’re done using it.
If you are new to using penis rings, get an adjustable single-strap penis ring. These types of C-rings are easy to remove.
Things to look out for when buying a penis Ring
What materials is the penis ring made from? Soft silicone or hardwood or metal or leather?
How easily do you bleed or suffer from blood clotting disorder? If you bleed easily, don’t use C-rings for long, and go for softer ones.
4) PROSTATE MASSAGERS
Prostate massagers are devices used to massage the prostate. The prostate is a part of the reproductive system connected to the penis and testicles (6). When the prostate is stimulated, it causes a nerve-wracking orgasm. Wicked orgasm!
Prostate massagers stimulate the prostate more than fingers can because it stimulates both surface-level and deep nerves.
There are loads of nerve endings in a man’s rectum, his butt, so when these massagers are inserted, they vibrate and lead to an immense sensation that makes a man orgasm. This slender toy with a curved tip targets the prostate gland, the P-spot (5)
Things to look out for when buying a prostate massager
- Must have flared base
- The material it is made from
5) OTHER SEX TOYS FOR MEN
- Anal vibrators
- Anal plugs
- Anal Beads
HOW TO CARE FOR YOUR SEX TOYS
- Don’t use sex toys without cleaning.
- Don’t share toys with people you don’t know or trust (Or don’t share at all)
- Keep sex toys in safe places, away from minors.
As a man, using sex toys improves your experience and allows you to try out different things. Whether you’re using these toys alone or with a partner, remember that the ultimate goal of these toys is a pleasure.
When using anal sex toys, it is important that you use lubricants alongside the toys because the butt isn’t as lubricated as the vagina. Also, don’t use silicone lubricants with silicone sex toys. The solid silicone will react with the silicone lube, leading to irritation on your skin, and if not checked, in your internal body system.