Contrary to societal and religious views, it has been proven scientifically that masturbation is normal and has no adverse consequences. “Playing with yourself is one of the most fun and popular alone time activities for people of all genders and ages.” (1)

 

Self-servicing can be a fun and healthy way to explore your sexuality and self-pleasure. However, it becomes a cause of concern when it interferes with your self-will and a sense of purpose. You should consider curbing masturbation or the use of sex toys if they’re taking the better part of your life.

 

Are addictions bad?

 

Masturbation aside, addiction across all topics and issues can be defective to our normal lives. What we are addicted to owns us and consequently robs us of the very essence of our being, which is the place of our conscious will and consent.

 

What you should not forget, however, is that having little or heavy fun with yourself either with the use of artificial or built-in toys is totally normal and has not been known to have any side effects. Still, if it’s a cause of concern to you, you should quit or cut back as much as possible. Place priority on your mental health and stability.

 

This article is a shot at showing you how you can avoid getting addicted or if addicted already, how to cut down or totally stop masturbation and the use of sex toys, not on grounds on “morality,” but on negative reflexes, psychological issues, health reasons, personal decision, etc.

 

When is masturbation getting out of hand?

 

Is there a time to get worried that you masturbate too much? Can it really get out of hand using your sex toys? While we will attempt to answer the latter further down in the article, we would like to point out warning signs that might suggest that you need to stop wanking yourself and shelf your toys.

  • Uncontrollable urge to masturbate
  • When it is affecting your relationship with other people
  • When you skip work, school, or social functions to satisfy yourself
  • Including time for masturbation in your to-do list
  • When it is negatively affecting you and others around you. For instance, if it interferes with your ability to have an orgasm or causes injury to your penis.
  • An intense feeling of guilt. This can stem from societal or religious inclinations.

 

How do you avoid getting addicted to masturbation and sex toys?

 

There is no hard and fast way to avoid being addicted to masturbation and the use of sex toys, except for the general approach in handling addictions.

 

Humans generally tend to overdo what they derive pleasure from, and as such, it can become an addiction insomuch that putting away or quitting becomes really difficult. Drunks go back to the same thing that knocked them off for hours just because they can’t seem to get away from it. Most remedies actually aim at fixing the addiction rather than stopping it in the first place.

 

By general principle (which applies to anything you can be addicted to), the rule is to be inconsistent.

 

Addiction is a result of constant practice. When you do something repeatedly over some time, it becomes a habit. While habits still give room for your choices to find expression, addiction leaves little or no room for you to exercise your choice or willpower. This is what makes masturbation addiction very unhealthy.

 

You are getting addicted to masturbation and sex toys when you no longer have control over it. The ways to avoid getting there include:

 

1. Identify your triggers.

If you haven’t been intentional about your sex life, you may find this task a little challenging. Just sit back and take a mental note of all the times you have used sex toys. What prompted you? If you can identify your triggers, you should control how you react to these triggers. It will help you decide if you masturbate under impulsion, compulsion, or a personal decision. Healthy masturbation should come from a place of uninfluenced choice or a conscious response to desire and self-pleasure.

 

2. Avoid Stress. 

If you often get stressed and do not know how to handle it effectively, settling for masturbation can seem like an easy out. But then, we know there is no way to avoid getting stressed regularly. While jerking off can look like a fantastic way to relieve yourself, it can lead to addiction. While it is OK to stress off after a hard day, it can be addictive to solve stress issues by self-servicing.

 

While there are other ways to avoid being addicted to masturbation and sex toys, the fundamental rule is to avoid consistency, especially when it’s more of an escapist approach than just the sheer pleasure you derive.

 

Why should you avoid being addicted in the first place? What’s wrong with being addicted to masturbation? While opinion varies on this subject, Bhuyan argues, “there is no evidence to support that sex toys can becoming physically or psychologically addicting” (paraphrasing)(2). 

 

Nena Messina, Ph.D., has this to say, “Too much masturbation, porn addiction, and compulsive sexual behaviors can interfere in individuals’ daily lives, which may affect their professional work and relationships. It is essential to stop masturbation or cut back on this habit to regain normalcy in their lives.” (3)

 

While both ideas can be conflicting, it is “safer” to know when to cut the habit if you notice irregularities in your day-to-day life you can trace to masturbation or the use of sex toys.

 

On one hand, you can get addicted. What if, on the other hand, you are already addicted, and you want to cut some slack. Here are things you can do to get out.

 

How to stop masturbation and sex toys addiction

As you would any compulsive or addictive problem, quitting masturbation and sex toy addiction is always a very daunting task. It doesn’t happen in a day. The determination to break ties must always be top-notch. 

 

If you have decided to quit, check out some helpful tips you can apply:

 

1. See a therapist.

Due to the stigmatization that comes with the issue, seeing a specialized counselor, psychiatrist, or psychologist well-versed in the subject matter and won’t make you feel guilty or judged is top of the list.

 

Finding a good therapist may not come easy. Still, if you reside in America, you can find a qualified sex therapist from the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT) (4) (Check out the references at the end of this article for link).

 

Among other things, a sex therapist would help you determine if your addictions are actually problematic. As Nicole Prause, Ph.D., points out, “Overwhelmingly, those who believe they are masturbating ‘too much’ actually are not masturbating at very unusual rates for their age and gender” (1).

 

 

2. Don’t be ashamed of guilt. 

Religious, cultural, and spiritual traditions label masturbation and the use of sex toys as sinful and immoral. This stigmatization can adversely affect a man who is addicted to it. Trying to break free from the addiction while carrying the guilt and shame will only make your journey longer and very tedious.

 

Masturbation is normal and shouldn’t be associated with immorality and the accompanying guilt. Tell your therapist how you feel. It is paramount you get to the base of your feelings and overcome them before you can talk about cutting the addictive ties loose.

 

3. Get busy.

Imagine masturbating while playing football or tennis. Not possible right? Yes. Filling your time with productive and fun activities is a great way to cut down the time you spend masturbating.

 

 

Find activities or sports that give you pleasure. Engage in them. Exercise often. Yoga, making friends, traveling, or visiting the museums can be an excellent way to get out of your old self obsessed with masturbating.

 

5. Cut down on time spent alone. 

Many men caught in the web of addiction to sex toys are often loners. They like to be alone, which gives them plenty of time for masturbation.

 

Think about things you do alone you can do with others. For example, if you love watching sports, try going to the stadium or a public bar rather than watching alone from your bedroom or living room.

 

Throw a watch party. Invite people over. Mix up. Come out of your shell.

 

6. Quit porn.

 It is difficult not to have this point on the list. For most men who masturbate or were introduced early in life, porn has been the major trigger. 

 

It is almost impossible to control a compulsive behavior like masturbating without cutting off a big sexual stimulator like pornography.

 

If porn is one of your triggers, you can ward off the urge by doing the following:

  • Install porn-detecting and blocking software on your phone and PC.
  • Move your computer from your room to a public space where you can hardly be alone.
  • Get rid of playboy or any other form of adult magazines and movies in the house.
  • Talk to a trusted friend who will not ridicule you to achieve accountability.

 

7. Join a social or support group. 

One of the best ways to deal with behavioral tendencies that spiral out of control is to become accountable. You can also learn new behaviors. For example, there are support groups that are set up specifically for people with out-of-control sexual behaviors.

 

You can find out from your doctor about such support groups around your area. There are also online groups you can join. Be active in the groups and do your due diligence to carry out all tasks or exercises they may recommend.

 

8. Wear extra clothes.

While it can be fun to sleep naked (you should try it once in a while), you might probably want to avoid that if you plan to get over your addiction. 

 

By rubbing or touching your penis mindlessly, you can be stirred to grab your sex machine and go for a fling. 

 

Your boxers or pants do provide some barrier between you and your genitals. Wear an extra layer or two of clothing to reduce the sensation. 

 

As we conclude…

 

Using sex toys for masturbating or with your partner is a healthy and normal activity. There is no scientific evidence yet to show that there are side effects to masturbating or using sex toys. But suppose you find out it is becoming an addiction beyond your control, interfering with your normal life and activities negatively; in that case, you can decide to stop or cut back to have a healthier relationship and life.

 

The process may be long and unproductive at first, but remember it took you time to get addicted; it will also take time to cut clean. So keep working on your positivity while finding all the help within your reach.

 

References

  1. https://greatist.com/health/how-to-stop-masturbating
  2. https://swell.damewellness.co/can-you-get-addicted-to-your-vibrator/
  3. https://addictionresource.com/addiction/masturbation/overcoming-masturbation-addiction/
  4. https://www.aasect.org/referral-directory